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Depression and anxiety
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I don't really like talking about this much, but some times I need to.
One of the reasons I got into UE was for adventure, because my life can be so incredibly challenging at times. I only found out for sure a couple of years back that I have Autism, which I had an inkling of. It makes communicating hard. Apparently I come across as being rude when I'm just trying to say something. So I try really hard to be super polite. You'll never hear me swear, except for the word "crap". Even then, I often rub people the wrong way, despite trying hard not to. I don't pick up on non verbal cues, and I don't get sarcasm despite trying to use it myself. It is very frustrating, somewhat isolating. I also have very bad depression and anxiety. I admit it is hard to hold down a job because of all of these.
Some days I feel like running away and never coming back. Some days I feel like killing myself. Some days it is really hard to get out of bed. but I try hard, roll out of bed, get in the shower and go to work. I don't talk much about my depression because I don't want to get people down.
I miss UE because I used to go in drains to escape the world and be alone. I never used drugs or drank (my parents were violent alcoholics so I never wanted to lose control like they did) so drains and exploring was my relief.
I realise my reputation in the UE world has suffered a lot because of my behavior due to my poor mental health and Autism. I know some people consider that I can't take a joke. I also realise I can't do anything to change that with some people. So I just try be nice and hope the people I meet these days will realise I'm just like them, just someone trying to cope and make my way in the world.
Autism, anxiety and depression are not things I'd wish on anyone. They're hard, they're painful and they can make your life hell.
"Oh! That's YOUR web site!" ... "Yep, that one." http://www.uer.ca/urbanadventure/www.ur ... windex.htm
And read the damn Newbies FAQ and guide to writing a first post! viewtopic.php?f=3&t=4257&p=40693
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Thanks for sharing mate :)
Many people here always keen for a meet and/or chat if you need support.

Fellow explorers often ask me what your like - my answer: Top bloke.
acually is nuggs
My Explores
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If you need any reassurance well it's better to talk about it and admit there's a problem than bottling it up.

Your tops for doing so :)
Just a harmless explorer. No need to waste taxes checking me ;)
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Gday...iam new here I've got ADHD which is on the bottom of the autism scale...you got aspergers by the sound of things? Need any pointers or advice hit me up ;)
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Panic you were one of the first people to rate, talk or pm me. You came across as a really nice person. I didn't catch a hint of any of the other stuff. I'm surrounded by people with all sorts of different things that make them who they are. Some extreme personalities but I always say you cant shut people out or you miss out on all their good stuff too.
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It doesn't take people long to forget or move on Panic. The scene has such a quick turn around that most of the people that had any issues have either moved on to something else or it's been that long that it's just a distant memory.

I have an autistic daughter and early intervention has been a great thing for her. Unfortunately back when you were a kid they tended to hide Autistic kids away from society.

Nowadays you hardly go a day without seeing someone with Autism.

Just focus on people that have positive interactions with you
Ironfistdoug on Instagram, YouTube & Vimeo.
drainsdrainsdrains at gmail dot com
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ironfistdoug wrote:
09 Sep 2017, 10:21 am
It doesn't take people long to forget or move on Panic. The scene has such a quick turn around that most of the people that had any issues have either moved on to something else or it's been that long that it's just a distant memory.

I have an autistic daughter and early intervention has been a great thing for her. Unfortunately back when you were a kid they tended to hide Autistic kids away from society.

Nowadays you hardly go a day without seeing someone with Autism.

Just focus on people that have positive interactions with you
Thanks Doug.

Yeah, I had no idea I had autism as a kid. I was just told I was weird or difficult. I got bullied heaps because of it.
I'm so glad these days people are waking up to it and making it easier for kids.
"Oh! That's YOUR web site!" ... "Yep, that one." http://www.uer.ca/urbanadventure/www.ur ... windex.htm
And read the damn Newbies FAQ and guide to writing a first post! viewtopic.php?f=3&t=4257&p=40693
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Not sure if you still post here, but I just wanted to show some solidarity. I initially was diagnosed with Aspergers when I quit drinking 5 years ago, but time has seen a more appropriate diagnosis of complex PTSD, which has expressed itself in the form of a schizoid personality type.

Not sure about you, but urbex definitely was a way of interfacing with the world, particularly as a kid. I'd just go off in my own little reverie and explore, contemplate... Something which has continued to this day. I've also found it hard to integrate with 'scenes' or groups of people, for ~7-8 years I did the doof thing, but god it just feels so empty at the end of the day. I think that's why I'm back here (on this forum, urbex)-- as part of my healing/recovery I've kinda looped back around to when I was about 11-15 years old, the time directly preceding the real onset of my poly-substance abuse. As such I've started exploring those activities which brought me a muted sense of satisfaction back then to see which will bring me a muted sense of satisfaction as an adult.

Anyway, I hope you're well. I did read your post on gender identity/discrimination and am saddened that you have been exposed to that level of hatred and discrimination in the context of a group of people existing on the fringes of society by default. Hope you're well.
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Much love.
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